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Covert Narcissits - How to Deal With It


                                                            Maria Lysenko on Unsplash

Have you ever heard the word "covert narcissists"? OK, I love calling them narcissists of today. There are many reasons why I want to give them that name. But let's start by explaining what narcissism
really is before we get into the details.

"I am much superior to him. I have a right to be respected. "

"I am worthy of everything positive in the world."

"Why was he promoted? I have better capabilities than him. "

These are some of the phrases that run through a narcissistic person's head. According to psychology, a narcissistic person has a mental illness that leads them to believe they are entitled to all the good things in the world despite the fact that they are not offering something good in exchange.

I just feel sorry for the people who are living with them because they are clearly having a difficult time and are constantly feeling inferior and doubting themselves at every turn. Just like every other person, I thought that narcissism was either a genetic trait or it resulted because the person has had traumatic and emotional experiences. I also read about instances of a very stressful relationship between narcissistic personalities and their parents who made them feel the way they did.

But lately, something caught my attention. It was a psychological analysis conducted by experts that proved that narcissism is not genetic, but that they are human beings created due to unnecessary attention and ‘overvaluation’.

They are oblivious to the feelings of others or lack empathy for them. According to them, they are the only victims on the planet, and all bad things seem to find their address. So, let us return to the original subject of modern-day narcissists. You will find them everywhere, believe me. It might be your boss, a co-worker, a friend, a love interest, your husband, or, in the worst-case scenario, your parents.

Having a narcissistic parent is the worst because you have no choice but to stay if you are financially dependent on them, and they will ensure that they dominate every aspect of your life.

Modern-day narcissism is a more subtle characteristic. That's why I came up with the term "covert narcissist." Some people are very good at masking their negative personality traits, and you won't know what you're dealing with until you've spent a lot of time with them.

However, if you are observant and do not trust people easily, it is not difficult to pick up on these characteristics. People who are covert narcissists will secretly show their displeasure, making you feel bad for everything you do.

The main reason is that they want things done their way and to still feel important. They are oblivious to the fact that others have lives as well and require recognition and credit from time to time.

If they do not get what they want or feel like they are not being given the importance that they deserve, they will respond in a way that will make you feel less confident in yourself.

They can disagree with you or show you the passive aggressive behavior that gives you the feeling that you did something wrong or handled it badly. But believe me that you have done nothing. In fact, it is their insecurity that causes them to do all this.

We also have a sense of self-awareness and are aware when we have harmed others. You'll know the difference if you're still perplexed because you've done nothing wrong but are still made to feel guilty and inferior for no reason.

  

 If all of this applies to you, my advice is to flee! If it is possible for you to avoid this individual, then do so. However, if it is not feasible to fully cut off contact, then you can employ some strategies to assist you in dealing with a narcissistic person.

The only way to deal with these types of individuals is to avoid them entirely. Engagement will result in a debate, which will rob you of your peace of mind.

It is preferable to forget and show little to no reaction. This is one of the most common strategies for dealing with a narcissist. You completely ignore their obnoxious behavior since they disrespect your feelings. I understand how difficult it is to do this with a parent or your husband. However, you can clearly choose your peace of mind by not arguing with them and further intimidating them. Your main aim should be to become financially stable so that you can easily decide whether to remain or leave.

I hope I was able to clarify the idea of narcissism and assist you if you are dealing with a narcissistic person. Being depressed will not improve but will exacerbate the situation. Try to come out of your shell and talk to someone to get your feelings out of your head. Remember that you have the right to live your life as you see fit, and no one can make you feel insignificant.

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