There are numerous articles on the internet about why is self-love important and how to love yourself. But I don't understand why we can't grasp the entire concept of love and the factors that influence it.
The concept of love at first sight is greatly exaggerated. It is impossible to love someone simply by looking at them or casting a single glance at them.
Love cannot be romantic; in fact, I do not believe that this adjective should be associated with love because it is not the only factor that can sustain love.
We, as humans, have a plethora of needs and requirements that revolve around our physical, mental, and spiritual selves.
There are many people who have failed relationships because the only concept that has remained with them throughout their lives is the love that they have read about in fairy tales or seen in movies.
The most pernicious lie is that "opposites attract." This fact simply does not hold water with me. Opposites may attract each other like magnets, but this is only a passing phase. We humans have an emotion called amusement, and we all become amused when we see something unusual. When we see someone react differently than we would in a given situation, we are fascinated and begin observing that person out of curiosity. But I'm not sure why we call this love. This isn't love; it's just a passing attraction born of curiosity.
We are bored with our daily routine and end up seeing or experiencing something new, which we interpret as love.
To keep our relationships going, we need something called security and attachment, which is driven by a factor called appreciation.
No matter how strongly we believe we are not egoistic, I believe a small part of us is a narcissist.
Our egos are fragile, and we will never be willing to completely sacrifice ourselves for someone unless and until we are financially or economically dependent on them in some way.
I have seen many women facing an abusive marriage and not being able to walk out because they are dependent on their spouse in a financial way and they feel that they cannot provide for the children the way the spouse can.
So is this love ?
Definitely not!
Relationships can have so many forms.
I have seen relationships work on the basis of trust, respect and appreciation alone.
And love should not be sacrificed or compromised.
It should not be in such a way that one has to wonder, "How do I love myself?"
If you're asking yourself this question, you're either in the wrong relationship or lacking confidence as a result of a previous incident or trauma.
Believe me it's a temporary phase!
Believe me it's a temporary phase!
I would recommend that you find someone who shares your interests and beliefs so that you can build a life together. Do not delude yourself into believing that an opposing person will make your life more exciting. Believe me, it will not be exciting, but rather a roller coaster on which you will not want to sit!
Arguments will turn into fights, and every day will be a nagging session.
Remember that human being will only get attached to a person if their physical, mental and spiritual needs are being met.
Once that attachment sets in for a long period of time then love and care blossoms in a relationship until then it is only curiosity and attraction.
So think about it again and try to figure out if your needs are being met and if you are happy where you are. Remember that we all love ourselves because we were created to do so. We are being deprived of our needs in one way or another, and thus the concept of self-love is born.
Remember self - love was always there! It cannot and is not supposed to be created or practiced.
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